Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Will You Take Me Back?

It's always a little bit silly to me how giddy I get when I finally get a chance to blog again. It's been a few days, and a few days well spent, I might add. And silly though it may be, I've missed you guys. Whatever "you guys" is. The great abyss? A dark hole? A world full of computerized robots that type back to me when I write something? The people my mom pays to comment on my blog so I don't lose self-esteem? Well, whoever you are, it's good to be back!

I feel like there are about 12 girl classes I missed. I don't know if each year of school there was a monumental "girl day" where you learn stuff, and it just so happened that I was absent that day, every year. Or maybe I missed the girl classes because they were taught by your sisters, and well, I don't have any sisters. However it happened, I missed them.

I've studied you all via blogs, facebook, and whatnot, and it's clear you all took the maybe you can catch me up on the ones I missed? Here's the list of the classes I unknowingly sloughed:

1. How to pose for pictures
2. How to take decent photos that don't have to be seriously edited
3. How to purchase shoes that are:
a. not brown
b. able to be worn with more than one outfit
4. How to say what's on your mind without taking a half-hour
5. How to not be OCD about silly things like if your husband slaps one bum cheek he must slap the other one for fear of feeling uneven
6. How to be funny without being inappropriate
7. How to enjoy a "good read"...or just a read at all
8. How to like girly foods such as:
frozen yogurt
non-fat anything
9. How to be okay losing a board game, Wii game, or any other game for that matter
10. How to fake wrestle with your husband rather than actually throwing punches
11. How to have flawless skin (or at least how to not have acne at age twenty something)
12. How to get pregnant

I am open to any and all suggestions. I'd love the notes I missed in those classes. Except maybe class #12. I bet those notes were pretty graphic.

Even though I'm not feeling particularly good at being a girl lately, I'm still really grateful I am one. I like being a girl. I like trying to be girly. And I really like that since I'm a girl I got a really cool boy husband.

Happy Wednesday Night.